The crockiest stories on the wire lately involve our crisis-crazed president, New York’s rude Senator Chuckie Schumer, and former VP/current climate hack, Al Gore.

Critical Barry: For Obama/Spider-man Comic  Barack Obama recently graded his first year in office with a B+, a generous grade indeed considering he has accomplished virtually nothing over the course of that year, except in the eyes of the politically-motivated Nobel Peace Prize Committee.

Now, with both his chief international and domestic initiatives on the verge of tanking, the man is getting desparate.

As the president takes flight to visit the Copenhagen Climate Change Conference, the talks are in a state of chaos,, with Copenhagen engulfed in the Climategate Affair, in a blizzard during global warming, and with police battling Communist agitators.

Obama’s planned “signature” accomplishment, Obamacare, is in Senate Limbo and Majority Leader Reid is expecting his lackeys to vote on a “reckless . . . irresponsible” 2,074 page bill they haven’t even seen:

Obama has apparently written off climate change agreement and stoked up his famed Crisis Machine to push through health care reform.

The president seems to have a special affinity for crises.  Hence we had the bank crisis, the auto crisis, the economic crisis, the climate crisis and, of course, the ongoing health crisis.

Obama’s cure for the health crisis has now become the be-all-and-end-all for the United States of America, without which the nation will go belly up.

With a straight face, ”President Obama told ABC News’ Charles Gibson in an interview that if Congress does not pass health care legislation that will bring down costs, the federal government ‘will go bankrupt.’ ”

No mention was made of plagues of locusts and pestilence and no explanation was offered as to how failure to pass a $2.5 trillion measure will bankrupt us but passing it will make us solvent. 

Go figure.

Mind you, that passage, which absolutely must be rushed through before Christmas, is totally unrelated to the fact Congresspeople would once again have to suffer the slings and arrows of outraged constituents over the Christmas break and maybe return without the same resolve to do the president’s bidding.

It’s also totally unrelated to Obama’s crying need to have something, anything, to show for 2009 when he delivers the 2010 State of the Union Address in January or else see 2009 cast upon the dungheap of abyssmal failure.

Chuckie’s Revenge: Chuckie Schumer has decided  No stranger to crocks, New York’s senior United States Senator Charles Ellis “Chuckie” Schumer, Prince of Pork, Defender of Bill Clinton and Women, Supporter of Same Sex Marriage, Anti-bank Regulator, and Precipitator of the IndyMac Bank Debacle, also has a nasty mouth.

We have all said things and used cuss words we regret but most politicians have more class–or should have more class–than to publically revile a woman with the B-word, that word rhyming with itch.

Chuckie, however, has no compunctions over using the word even when the woman in question is simply doing her assigned job.

It’s said that the most dangerous position to be in in D.C. is between Schumer and a camera and Chuckie has proven that true over the years. 

Not a day goes by, literally, that he is not on television and in the papers advocating, complaining, or bloviating about something or other, no matter how trivial, as long as he gets his face before the voters.

There were no visible cameras aboard his US Airways flight the other day when a female flight attendant politely asked Schumer to turn off his cell phone so the plane could take off.

“Schumer, a Democrat, asked if he could finish his conversation and he was told no.  He hung up but continued arguing and then called the woman a ‘bitch,’ according to a House Republican aide seated nearby.”

Not content with insulting the attendant, Schumer, arch-defender of women (voters), then petulantly added, “It’s Harry Reid calling. I guess health care will have to wait until we land.”  Unstated meaning: Obamacare will stagnate without Schumer’s indispensable input with Harry. 

FAA regs apparently don’t apply to liberal, Democrat senators from New York with the fate of America’s health care in his hands.

His seatmate, appointed New York Democrat junior Senator Kirsten Gillibrand was proven a liar when she denied Schumer had been impolite after a Schumer spokesman issued an apology saying Chuckie had “made an off-the-cuff comment under his breath that he shouldn’t have made, and he regrets it:”

It’s not often one apologizes for and regrets, even through an intermediary, making polite comments.

Off the cuff or on, it would have been far more gracious for the senator to issue a personal apology for the bitch comment and perhaps to have offered the flight attendant a senate job in compensatory damages.

Well, that would be foolish.  Bill Clinton showed the way for how Dem pols should deal with underlings and Chuckie was just following tradition.

The good news is that the female attendant wasn’t a White House intern instead.

The Goreacle: use of the Goreacle™ Brand  If Schumer is the Prince of Pork then Al Gore is the uncontested King of Crock.

He has a long and ignoble history of avoiding probing questions on the project to which he has dedicated his existence, saving the Earth, and has, again literally, never been called to account by the mainstream media for the lies and exaggerations in An Inconvenient Truth.

It’s no wonder, then, with his Academy Award and Nobel Prize tucked under his bulging belt, that he feels immune from such mundane requisites as truth.

However, at the Climate Summit last Monday he was caught with his global warming pants down when he was called on an out and out prevarication.

With typical Gorean factual manipulation, he cited by name “one scientist [who] had predicted the polar ice cap would have no summer ice in five to seven years.”

He would have been better off fabricating that tidbit of fear, as he usually does, instead of naming names.

Instead he threw in this emphasis: “These figures are fresh.  Some of the models suggest to Dr. [Wieslaw] Maslowski that there is a 75 percent chance that the entire north polar ice cap, during the summer months, could be completely ice-free within five to seven years.”

Again, fortunately, no mention of locusts or pestilence, both of which would thrive in Gore’s brave new warm world.

When he heard of Gore’s citation, Dr. Maslowski politely contradicted him and said he never made such a prediction.

A “Warmist” himself but with far more integrity and respect for truth than Big Al, Dr. Maslowski issued this mild rebuke: “It’s unclear to me how this figure was arrived at.  I would never try to estimate likelihood at anything as exact as this.”

Not a guy to blithely admit he was totally wrong, Gore backpedalled with a misleading rejoinder conceding the staleness rather than freshness of his figures:

At the same time, he cast an aspersion on the veracity and accuracy of Dr. Maslowski when his office contended that Gore’s numbers were based on a discussion he had had with Maslowski some years ago.

Al, the guy has already said he would “never” make such an estimation.  Get with the program!  Either you’re calling Dr. M. senile or you’re calling him a liar.  Which is it?

Based on your track record and the history of the entire global warming/climate change charade, I’d suggest Al is the unconscionable fibber.

It’s tough to decide the most worthy recipient of the Master Crockster Prize between Obama, Schumer, and Gore.  I’d have to award them a three-way tie.